Krystina Lucille Tessinari

Hi Krystina,

Well I had some wonderful news today.  No, not about my best friend I think that will many many years in the making but about a job I loved and hoped would turn out well, and it did.  I had a couple of people I wanted to share it with and you were on of them.  I just feel blessed today.  I didn't know what the outcome would be and I am impressed that they did what they said they would and gave me a chance.  So that's all I am going to say right now about that.

I had Arielle friend request me on Facebook and I still have a few reservation.  There is so many issues that your father and Arielle and myself have to discuss and clear up.  Its just one of those things.  I think about becoming a grandmother again and I think why do I want to put myself through this all over again.  It hurts way to much to have something and then lose it.  I congratulated them on them expecting a child but I think and think about it so much already.  I can't be disloyal to you and love another fully I am afraid.  I was thinking about taking a trip up to their home to iron it all out.  But I thought more about that and said I wasn't ready yet for that.  Your father does have a way with kind and sweet words and I don't want to be suckered in.  But then maybe for once he can mean it and stick to it.  He said he would show me he is different so I have to just wait till I see it.

I find people don't understand me well when I blog.  I tell everyone this is how I see it and of course they are going to have their own opinion on things.  But this is me and my feelings and I am so aloud to have my own feelings.  I won't stop having opinions, because its just not me.

I love you and wanted to write you a short note.  I feel like one day maybe you will understand me more then anyone else in the family and say to yourself my grandmother was crazy but at least honest on things and what she feels.  Now don't get it messed up that honest is the whole story.  Because it's never the whole story.  There can be a story read by three different people and those three have three different opinions on what they have read.  Or they have their own honest opinion on what happened in that situation.  This is just me and my opinions on things I have seen or been through or heard.

You have to come up with your own conclusion in life and what you see or read or have gone through.  I have seen some recent pictures and you and Zoe have gotten bigger.  People that have seen them swear you look like me, but I see your father in you.  Poor Kayti {your mom}, she will have her hands full when you are a teenager.  I find even though you may not be raised with your father, you may have some of his traits.  Its happened with all of your Uncles with me.  They weren't raised with their fathers but they have their traits on way or another.

Well little one.  I am going to end this with a big old hug from your grandmother.  I am the big fat ugly one in the many pictures you will see of me on the internet.  I love you and may god have a shield over you and yours.

Love always and forever
Your Gandmother

Krystina and Kayti 2013

 

 

Krystina L Tessinari

Dearest Krystina,                                                     

Well your grandmother is a royal screw up sometimes.  Totally miss the mark on being a friend.  I don't think it was all my fault but I have to accept the blame for my not listening to a friend.  Hell it was my fault for not listening.  Plus, we must remember I am famous for putting my feelings out there.  I will go to my death putting my feelings out there.  When you have a best friend it will hurt when you are in a disagreement or the friendship ends.  It will make you sad and emotional and then very very angry.  I didn't listen when she didn't want something and I did it anyway.  And she took it out on my family and I was hurt.  So I put my humiliation and embarrassment out there.  It was how I felt and there were many people that understood my feelings and didn't put me down for it.  Whats perfect is these are the same people that know my friend and myself, and many that didn't know the both of us.  No sides were taken and no harsh words were spoken only concern.  Somehow I didn't know they were out there.  You would be surprised to know that when you are done and feeling so badly there are people that will post a saying to lift you or call or just have something nice to say.  

I am a natural  writer when it comes to my feelings.  I can't keep things bottled up.  It explodes into a mess and unless I get them out it physically hurts.  That's why I write I guess, I get to where I can't see pictures of you or I have the love for you that wells up and I have to write you.  Plus one day you will google your name and do you realize  how many posts will come up.  Many many many.  I am amazed by who reads this blog.  And who have made comments and the forgiveness I just recently felt for someone.  It's a honor to have somewhere where I can just type away.  

I was thinking of you Krystina.  My wisdom isn't good sometimes.  But if you have a best friend and you get to that rough road in that friendship it may not survive.  You may feel like you lost a vital part of you.  There may be a time in your life you will go through that.  It hurts, I won't sugar coat it my lovely grand-daughter.  Its painful and emotional and then the anger comes in.  But remember sometimes there is no going back.  It may take many years.  It may take days.  Friendships have thorns and they are sharp sometimes because you share everything.

I love you my gorgeous grand-daughter.  I am sure you heard the news or not about your dad having another baby with Arielle.  I am having so many mixed feelings.  I don't want to be loyal to another grandchild for so many reasons.  I can't seem to get close to any other child because its disloyal to you for one.  I don't know its just so many new feelings about the situation.  I know what I wrote in this blog about if this came up.  But being human it still pulls at you.  I can't survive another lost grandchild.  It physically makes me sick of what it means to love another grandchild.  

Enough all ready right.  Time to get my "big girl shoes on".  I made a great grandmother.  But sometimes I make a lousy human being.  

Anyway lots of love and hugs, 
Your grandmother      

Suarez Family

***  I did not know about the family link this has.  It's not immediate family but Kayti's twin Nikki and her children are the immediate family linked to this family missing.  I am posting this as support and wish the family god's peace.  It's a tragic thing for family to go through something like this.  Say "I love you everyday to the people that matter" its always important because you never know.  May god give you peace in times of hardship.

Orlando group joins Deltona vice mayor in search for missing Deltona family

Thalia Otto, 9, and Michael Otto, 8, are missing along with their mother, Yessenia Suarez.
Provided by Felicia Perez

By Patricio G. Balona
patricio.balona@news-jrnl.com

Published: Friday, November 8, 2013 at 1:10 p.m.

Last Modified: Saturday, November 9, 2013 at 3:35 p.m.

DELTONA — About 30 people are expected to join Deltona vice mayor Zenaida Denizac on Friday afternoon to discuss ways in which the community can help the family of a missing Deltona mom and her children.

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• Deltona Search Intensifies
• Deltona Family Missing

“It’s been so hard on them,” Denizac said in a telephone interview. “We have to continue searching for them.”

The group started with a couple of people from Orange County contacting Denizac offering help to the family and will meet at Deltona City Hall at 2345 Providence Blvd. at 4 p.m. Friday. Anyone who wants to help is also welcome at the meeting.

Strategies will be discussed on how to continue looking for the bodies of Yessenia Suarez, 28, and her two children, Thalia Otto, 9 and Michael Otto, 8, who went missing Oct. 23, Denizac said.

Diana Mejia, director of the nonprofit said that her organization is supporting the family because they work with victims of domestic violence and understand the pain they are going through.

“Finding Yessenia and her children is a priority.” Mejia said. “We are a faith-based organization and we believe that when there is unity, there are better results.”

Volusia sheriff’s investigators have said that Luis Toledo, 31, Suarez’s husband, killed her with a martial arts blow to her throat. Toledo is charged with second-degree murder in connection to Suarez’s death. Although Toledo admitted killing Suarez, he is not telling what he did with her body. Toledo denied killing the children but told investigators someone else did kill them, his arrest report said.  

Investigators said Suarez and her children disappeared between 1 a.m. and 5 a.m. Oct. 23. Toledo said that he struck Saurez during an argument over marital problems in their 317 Covent Gardens Place home. The family said that the couple were talking about a divorce. Toledo is not the biological father of the children.

The Sheriff’s Office continues to investigate the disappearance of Suarez and her children, said sheriff’s spokesman Brandon Haught.

“Targeted investigative searches are still ongoing,” Haught said Friday afternoon. “They have been since this case started.”

Equusearch of Orlando will search areas identified by the family Saturday and a handful of deputies will accompany them, Haught said.

“The search will be primarily owned by them,” Haught said.

The group coming to Deltona on Friday afternoon, known as Nuveo Sendero (New Path), is an Orange County group campaigning against domestic violence. But their focus in Deltona is to offer support to Suarez’s family and brainstorm ideas on how they can help find Suarez and her kids, Denizac said.

“Basically these are groups from Orange County who have been reaching out to me,” Denizac said. “The intention is to unite the community, discuss strategies, plan a vigil.”

Part of the group’s effort has been to open a fund called the The Yessenia Suarez and Kids Fund which was done Friday afternoon at a TD Bank in Deltona. All the money raised will be used in the continued search for the bodies of the mother and her children. Donations can be made at any TD Bank, Denizac said.

Ruben Perez, the stepfather of Suarez, could not immediately be reached Friday afternoon.

“Everybody wants to help,” Denizac said. “The goal is to unite city and make sure this is not forgotten.”

Thank You Karen Wolters

See everyone a person has to step back and wonder if the truth is being told or am I being snowballed into believing something that may not be true.  I only have my truth to things, only what I am told or see.  Yet ten people can be told one thing or see one picture and come up with ten different interpretations.  Its a  part of being human and having different separate opinions.  Karen Wolters in my book may have stepped back and took a look at things.  That makes her human to me instead of me seeing her through a mothers eyes as being the most selfish human being in the world keeping my ex husband away from his children.  Did she call me ghetto and uneducated?  Maybe, because she was defending a man that she loved.  I don't fault her on that, or maybe I did, because she had her thoughts on me.  But for her to say, you know MyLinh I may have listened to much to Dan.  That is the only thing I wanted.  I don't want someone that say, MyLinh you are right.  Because god knows I am never always right.  I may never be right on how I interpret things.  I saw what I saw or what I was told also.  It takes a big person to acknowledge maybe they were wrong about some things and Karen Wolters in my book is a big enough person to do that.  And I am a big enough person to say that I APPRECIATE THAT.

So thank you Karen.  I have peace now when it comes to you.  And I hope you are now more peaceful with me.

MM      

Maritza Wehmann

Dear Friend

  It takes a balancing act to have friends and I guess my balance was off.  I shared secrets with you and you shared secrets with me.  We were once again friends.  But not enough to weather a storm.  The perfect storm hit and it was called Hurricane Birthday Party.  It's strange how things can change overnight.  I take my responsibilities on what happened.  Yet I am proud to have had a hand in bringing your daughters all under one roof for you.  And that you got to see your grandson in person.

  I was hurt and I had true enough feelings to know that the pain hurt very much.  But with another friends help I found that I had a hand in my feelings being hurt.  I didn't listen very well.  I am blogging about this my friend and will  blog about this many years to come because that's what I do.  I have regrets in my part and you might have regrets in your part.  You were a special friend to me.  I listened to all your escapades and you listened to mine.  We never had any judgements for each other no matter if it was right or wrong.  Yet you didn't understand how I can be hurt?  It strange that I can understand how you can be hurt but you can't understand how I could have been hurt.  So you have your feelings hurt now because I posted my feelings about the matter.  Well I can't be my true self without feelings.  Boy do I try to lay them all out.  Its  good that with all the trouble in the past your family has gone through with each other that you ended up having that birthday party and trip to Disney with everyone.  Sorry you thought it was a military action when it came to my party for you.  Hell it wasn't even just my plan, because your sister Lynette and Mary had a hand in planning it with me for months.  But I understand the military thing.  Looked like a army invaded your home.  But we were always welcomed so I didn't think anything of it to put us all together for your birthday.  If that is how you felt though I acknowledge that to the fullest.

  Good luck on your new home.  You deserve to have it.  No one is more happier then I am for you.  I am glad to see your family closing ranks around you.  And you never thought they would.  One day my family will come together also.  If its me or a friend that sets it off and gets it done maybe I will have my own perfect storm to weather.  Wouldn't that be nice.  I could go through the same thing and get paid back.  You would love to hear about that one day.  Well I will miss your escapades and you will miss my non sex life I am sure.  Get a good laugh at this one day.  Take those pictures you always wanted.  And try to enjoy life.  Its to short not to.  No matter what kind of problems I am having life must go on.  For better or for worst.

MM



****It is April 4, 2014 and I have to say we did weather the storm.  It's funny how something said could be taken the wrong way.  Between Marie not texting a message the right way and misunderstanding, it could have ruined a friendship.  But we got together weeks after this and did make up.  Thats important to me that two people can sit down and get what was meant to be said out, because its just one of those things when you don't get what you mean out.  It's read the wrong way and you never meant it to be interpreted that way.  So feelings get hurt and you lose something precious in life.  But I love my friend and she loves me and I have no doubt that this could happen again but we have made promises.  If this ever happens we spend 3 days at the max pissed off and come together to talk it out.  Because its important to us.